The Book Wheel

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Shh! ‘Quiet’ is Just Okay

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Shh! ‘Quiet’ is Just OkayQuiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain
Published by Crown Publishing Group on January 4, 2012
Genres/Lists: Non-Fiction, Science/Technology/Psychology
Pages: 352
Read synopsis on Goodreads
Buy the book: Amazon/Audible (this post includes affiliate links) three-stars


I know I’m a few months late, but I finally jumped on the Quiet (by Susan Cain) train. I had to wait for it to become available through the library, but that’s okay because it was mostly worth the wait. Not that I enjoy waiting, though, because I fall on the extrovert side of the spectrum. But, I also take a lot of things personally, so technically I think I’m a sensitive extrovert (I am also reward and threat sensitive). Whatever I am, I went into this thinking I’d learn a lot about how to understand my introverted husband, but instead I just read more of the same things I already knew.

I did have a lot of ‘aha’ moments during this book. It wasn’t that the information was new, necessarily, but that it was put forth in such a way that it made sense. Such as open office plans being distracting and bad for memory or that it’s better to study alone than in groups. These things make sense but I never gave them much thought.

As a book nerd, I loved the section about ‘flow’ (pursuing something for its own sake). For me, reading gives me flow. I do it for me, not because I gain outside rewards from it. I do it simply because I want to and I enjoy it. Granted, one could argue that liking something is a reward in itself, but that is a philosophical discussion that I am choosing not to go into right now (but it’s along the lines of whether or not someone can be truly altruistic).

My only problem with this book is that the author used the word ‘gregarious’ on almost every other page. You know how when you say something over and over again it sounds weird and loses meaning? That’s what happened with ‘gregarious’ – I just started skipping sentences with that word in it because it held no meaning anymore.

All in all, I wasn’t dazzled by this book like many people seemed to be, but I enjoyed it. It was interesting, informative, and gave me some food for thought. I’m glad I read it, but I don’t know that my life is much different.

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  • oh you slay me! I guess there had to be one book we wouldn’t agree on ;-D Though I will admit to being a highly sensitive introvert. It was nice to have the validation of so much that Cain wrote about in her book. . .though I will agree – gregarious got a little old and every time I heard the word I thought of the bad guy on the Smurfs – didn’t his name start with ‘grega. .” or something like that? Can you tell I’m tired and rambling and coming up with crazy stuff to share!

    I just googled it – ‘Gargamel’ is the Smurf bad guy – kind of close to gregarious, yes?!?

    • Haha! Maybe if I was more introverted I would have gotten it but I go back and forth between which one I am. It really depends on the day.

  • If you’re late reading it, I’m not sure what that makes me! :p

    I basically had the same gut reaction: It was interesting and useful to see the information laid out with some scientific backing, but I knew most of this before. That “nonjudgmental” group brainstorming doesn’t stop being feeling judged by the group? Obvious!

    I think it’s a useful read, and as I said in my review, I think it would do educators a lot of good to think more about the ideas presented. I wish I could have explained coherently to many of them that I learned better by listening, not by spouting off the first random thoughts that came into my mind. Being forced into class participation didn’t help me or “break me out of my shell.” It stressed me out and actually hindered me from learning the way I like to learn.

    Overall, however, I think this is more of a “borrow” book than a “buy” one. I might try to see if I can lend my copy to anyone, then perhaps ultimately give it away.

    • The Book Wheel

      That is a great way to put it – that it’s a borrow book, not a buy book. I enjoyed it but, it was more of a condensed version of everything I’ve heard over the years than anything new.

  • I agree. I had many aha moments but also felt like the book was geared more towards introverts who were quiet than towards learning about introversion. But that’s okay, they need books, too!

    • The Book Wheel

      That’s true – but we had this discussion already, so I won’t go into it too much here!

  • Haha she does use the word “gregarious” a lot, didn’t she? I suppose there are only so many words you can use to describe certain personality tendencies? I probably processed this book a bit differently than you because I am an introvert, but I found it very validating. As someone who has frequently been exposed to attitudes that being quiet is bad, I really enjoyed reading about the positive attributes of introversion. Many of them were things I always knew (or assumed), but it really helped me figure out how to frame being quiet as an advantage as I interview for jobs.

    • The Book Wheel

      I think it’s a much better read for introverts for exactly those reasons. Of the people I know who read it, the extroverts are mostly blah about it and the introverts love it.

      Where’s her chapter on THAT?!

  • Definitely understand the flow part. When I signed up for NetGalley and told a coworker/fellow reader about it, he asked if I was getting paid. I said no, why does that matter! I get to read and review books before anyone else, duh!

    • The Book Wheel

      Exactly!

  • I will be on this bandwagon soon, I really want to read this book! I had to laugh when I read your comment on the word gregarious… I actually double-check my posts to make sure I didn’t overuse my favorite adjectives, for the very reason you state! 😉

    • The Book Wheel

      I wish I had known from the beginning to count how many times it is in the book. Maybe you can keep a tally when you read it!

  • I enjoyed the book and yes, it is helpful in understanding a different way of experiencing the world, the only thing i didn’t like was an extended emphasis on the impact of this personality trait on the working environment and vice versa and the assumption that everyone works in offices.

    • The Book Wheel

      Very good point! And not every office is set up like that, either!

  • I really loved it, but I don’t think you’re alone. My IRL book club read it and we were about half-half. Several people felt the same way you did; they said it read a little too much like homework and they had a hard time getting into certain sections. I’m curious how opinions fall on introvert/extrovert sides, because I think the book could have been a little alienating if I were reading as an extrovert.

    • The Book Wheel

      Maybe thats why – because I’m more extroverted. I’m usually a huge fan of these kinds of books (Like The Psychopath Test), but this one fell a bit flat.

  • Now the word gregarious sounds weird to me too…great 😉 I’ll be getting to this book one of these days and now I’m really looking forward to reading the section about flow. I have a feeling that I’ll enjoy that. Lovely review! 🙂

    • The Book Wheel

      Thank you! And I bet you’ll be overwhelmed by the word gregarious, now that I have pointed it out!

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